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OPINION: 4 Mistakes You Should Completely Avoid When You Are In A Serious Relationship

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Being in a serious relationship requires effort, commitment, and clear communication. While every relationship is unique, there are some common mistakes that can undermine the strength and longevity of your bond. Here are four critical mistakes you should avoid to foster a healthy, loving, and lasting relationship.

1. Lack of Communication

Communication is the foundation of any successful relationship. When you’re not open with each other about your needs, desires, and concerns, misunderstandings can arise, leading to unnecessary conflicts. Avoid assuming that your partner knows how you feel or what you want. Regular, honest conversations are vital for maintaining a strong connection. Even when discussing difficult topics, it’s essential to be kind and respectful, as poor communication can lead to emotional distance…Click Here To Continue Reading>> …Click Here To Continue Reading>>

 

2. Taking Your Partner for Granted

When the initial excitement of a relationship fades, it’s easy to fall into a routine where you start to take each other for granted. It’s crucial to continue showing appreciation for your partner, even after the “honeymoon phase.” Small gestures like saying thank you, offering compliments, or simply making an effort to spend quality time together can make a huge difference. Never assume that your partner knows how much you care without showing it.

3. Ignoring Personal Boundaries READ FULL STORY HERE>>>CLICK HERE TO CONTINUE READING>>>

Respecting each other’s boundaries is key to maintaining a healthy relationship. Overstepping emotional, mental, or physical boundaries can lead to feelings of discomfort or resentment. Whether it’s about personal space, privacy, or emotional needs, it’s important to recognize that both partners are individuals with distinct needs and preferences. Discuss boundaries early in the relationship and check in with each other regularly to ensure both people feel respected and valued.

4. Letting Issues Pile Up

Avoid sweeping problems under the rug or allowing issues to pile up without addressing them. Unresolved problems can fester and grow into bigger issues that are harder to deal with over time. It’s important to address conflicts as they arise and approach them with the goal of resolution rather than blame. Avoid letting resentment build up, as it can erode trust and intimacy. Constructive conflict resolution is essential for keeping the relationship strong and healthy.

By being mindful of these common mistakes, you can cultivate a deeper, more respectful, and harmonious relationship, creating a lasting partnership built on mutual love and understanding.

 

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The True Story of Ghana Must Go Exodus in 1983

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Ghana Must Go bags

Growing up in Nigeria, Ghana and some other neighbouring countries, you must have heard of the popular term “Ghana Must Go“. Yes! It is the name of a commonly used bag for storing belongings or packing loads when travelling.

But have you ever wondered why this bag, called “Chinatown tote” in the USA and “Tuekenkoffer” in Germany, is called “Ghana Must Go” in Nigeria and Ghana? Well, someone did not just sit and coin a name for the bag, a real-life incident that happened in Nigeria back in 1983 named the bag Ghana Must Go…Click Here To Continue Reading>> …Click Here To Continue Reading>>

 

Ghanaians on their way to Ghana

The Origin of Ghana Must Go

In 1983, during the democratic regime of President Sheu Shagari, the federal government of Nigeria ordered a mass deportation of illegal immigrants living in Nigeria due to the atrocities many of them were reportedly committing in the country.

More than half of those deported were Ghanaians who had come to Nigeria in search of better living in the 1970s when Nigeria was experiencing oil boom while Ghana, on the other hand, was witnessing political and economic hardship.

But the Nigerian government did not just wake up one day to expel over 2 million Africans from Nigeria, there were certain factors (one mentioned above) that culminated in the expulsion.

Nigeria and Ghana are good allies and have been maintaining their relationship before independence till today. But this friendship was threatened in the 1980s during the regime of the Ghanaian Head of State, Flight Lieutenant Jerry J. Rawlings and the Nigerian President, Alhaji Sheu Shagari.

Both African leaders were not in good terms and this was because President Shagari was a good friend of Ghana’s former president, Hilla Limann, whom Rawlings overthrew his government.

Refugees leaving Nigeria wait at the boarder to enter Benin as part of their journey back to Ghana (Photo by Michel Setboum/Getty Images)
NIGERIA – 1983: Refugees leaving Nigeria wait at the border to enter Benin as part of their journey back to Ghana (Photo by Michel Setboum/Getty Images)

This deteriorated the Ghana-Nigeria relationship to the extent that in 1982, Rawlings raised an alarm that Shagari wanted to help Limann overthrow his government, and in response, Nigeria stopped the shipping of crude oil on a loan deal to Ghana. As this beef continued between the government, so did it go on among the citizens.

Maitastine Uprising of 1980

The foreigners in Nigeria were seriously threatening the peace of the country and Nigerians were not ready to take that. The situation began heating up in 1980 when a Cameroonian expatriate named Muhammed Marwa alias Maitastine spearheaded a religious uprising (Maitastine Uprising of 1980) that led to the death of many people.

Maitastine was an illegal immigrant like many of his followers who were from Burkina Faso, Niger and Cameroon. This uprising is considered the second most tragic event in Nigeria after the Biafran war.

Maitatsine
Maitatsine captured by military men

It should also be noted that there had existed an old wound in the Nigeria-Ghana relationship back in 1969 when the Ghanaian government effected the Alien’s Compliance Order. Nigerians and other African immigrants were deported on the claim that Ghana was in recession.

The Last Straw

The last straw that broke the camel’s back was the robbery at Ekwueme’s house. Alexander Ekwueme, the then Nigerian Vice President, was robbed by a group of armed robbers which consisted mainly of expatriates. When the robbers were caught by the police, it was discovered that two of them were Ghanaian.

This sent the whole of Nigeria crazy. Instant action was taken by the Nigerian government and the Ministry of Internal Affairs. On the 17th of January, 1983, the Nigerian Minister of Internal Affairs, Alhaji Alli Baba, announced the immediate expulsion of all illegal immigrants in Nigeria within two weeks. President Sheu Shagari also added in a statement,

If they don’t leave, they should be arrested and tried, and sent back to their homes. Illegal immigrants under normal circumstances, should not be given any notice whatsoever. If you break a law, then you have to pay for it. READ FULL STORY HERE>>>CLICK HERE TO CONTINUE READING>>>

Panic gripped all foreigners without papers in Nigeria for it was the least expected action of the Nigerian government. Over 1 million Ghanaians were thrown into confusion and indecision. It was rumoured that the Federal government gave power to Nigerians to confront any alien after the ultimatum given to leave.

Ghana Must Go

This scared the expatriates and sent them fleeing with and without their luggage. Those who could pack their belongings used the biggest of bags available which happened to be the big bag which is now called Ghana must go.

Returning refugees at the Ghana border. (Photo by Michel Setboum/Getty Images)
NIGERIA – 1983: Refugees leaving Nigeria wait at the border to enter Benin (Photo by Michel Setboum/Getty Images)

This mass deportation met global criticisms. The act was condemned by many humanitarian organizations across the globe. The US Department of State said the expulsion order was “shocking and a violation of every imaginable human right.” All these did not make the Nigerian government reverse the order. It still bent on expelling all illegal immigrants in the country.

Also, there were claims that the “corruption-riddled” government of President Sheu Shagari ordered the deportation to divert attention from its shenanigans because an election was forthcoming. Truly, the Shagari government had to pull a stunt to divert the attention of Nigerians and win their votes.

Ghanaians trooped out en masse for they knew Nigeria was no longer safe for them. It was indeed a massive exodus that automatically rooted its feet in the history of Nigeria and Ghana. They (Ghanaians) camped at the Seme border as they waited to enter Benin Republic where they hoped to find a ship to Ghana.

OldNaija gathered that the land route through Togo was much preferable and convenient but the Ghanaian dictator, Jerry J Rawlings had closed the Ghana-Togo border due to an attempted coup in 1981. Togo also closed down its border with Benin in order to avoid refugee crises.

After some time, the Ghanaian military ruler, Jerry Rawlings, opened the Ghana-Togo border and left Togo no choice but to do the same with Benin Republic and allow refugees to flow across like water.

Jerry J Rawlings at Tema Habour during Ghana must go saga
Ghanaian Head of State, Jerry J Rawlings at Tema Habour with deported Ghanaians

It was indeed great news for the Ghanaian refugees. On getting home, they were welcomed by relatives and friends amidst tears. Jerry Rawlings also visited some of them at Tema harbour and assured them that his government would provide assistance in every possible way.

This is the real bitter story behind every ‘Ghana must go’ bag. However, it should be known that today, Nigeria and Ghana remain the best of friends as they let the past behind them. This is evident in the entertainment, sports and politics sectors of the two countries.

“History should not be used as an instrument of revenge but rather as a tool for preventing future mistakes.”

Teslim O. Omipidan

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King Jaja of Opobo: The Sad History of a Brave Leader

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King Jaja of Opobo

Who was King Jaja of Opobo?

King Jaja of Opobo was the charismatic and brave leader of Opobo, a city-state in modern-day Rivers State, who fought against the penetration and domination of British trade in the Igbo hinterland.

Jaja was a Nkwerre man, born around 1821 in Umuduruoha in Amaigbo. His real name was Mbanaso Okwaraozurumba; he later took up the name Jaja because of his dealings with the British. For cutting his top teeth which is an abnormal and evil phenomenon in Igbo tradition, he was sold off to a wealthy man, Iganipughuma Allison of the Delta town of Bonny which as at then was populated by Igbo slaves…Click Here To Continue Reading>> …Click Here To Continue Reading>>

 

In Bonny, Jaja was given the name Jubo Jubogha and was ranked on the lowest rung of slaves which included the ones born outside the town, and because he was difficult to control, Jaja was gifted to Chief Madi of the House of Anna Pepple by his own master.

Jaja’s rise to power

While in the house of Anna Pepple, Jaja earned respect and rank with his skills in trade. He was admired by the leading members of the house and was later elected head of the house. This did not go well with some of the slaves in the house, so Jaja was later confronted with obstacles. An envious influential ex-slave named Oko Jombo battled and defeated Jaja with the help of King George Pepple. JaJa fled for his life and settled at a site close to the Ikomtoro River where he, as a talented trader, blocked the flow of Palm Oil to Pepple in Bonny.

On the 4th of January, 1873, Jaja signed a treaty with the British crown because of his dissatisfaction with a commercial agreement initiated by king George of Bonny. The treaty recognized Jaja as the king of Opobo and gave him the sole monopoly of trading except only in the White Man’s Beach.

This treaty was interpreted otherwise by the newly dispatched Consul to the British Queen, E.H. Hewett, who denied that the treaty granted a monopoly of the market to King Jaja of Opobo. The decision to impede the white man from proceeding higher up the river of Opobo, Hewett argued, was for sanitary reasons only. The treaty of 1873 appears to have been finally superseded by the treaty of the protectorate of the Berlin Conference on the 19th of December, 1884 which puts the Niger District under “Her Majesty the Queen.”

King Jaja (left) and Governor Nana Olomu (right)
King Jaja (left) and Governor Nana Olomu (right)

The Fall and Exile of King Jaja

For intrigues made to preserve his believed trade rights, King Jaja was accused of obstructing trade and infringing the agreement made at the Berlin Conference. King Jaja, failing to understand the full import of the establishment of a protectorate for the district in which his kingdom was part, sent a deputation to the Foreign Office in London to plead his case to the Earl of Roseberry. READ FULL STORY HERE>>>CLICK HERE TO CONTINUE READING>>>

“(The Consul) is pushing Old Bonny people to go to our markets, while we do not interfere with theirs. Your Lordship would therefore see exactly what trouble he is trying to bring upon us.”

The Consul decided to get rid of King Jaja of Opobo and thus persuaded the King of Bonny to repudiate him. He isolated King Jaja politically and asked for permission to remove him “temporarily” to Gold Coast, now Ghana.

Before King Jaja of Opobo was banished to Accra, Gold Coast, the Foreign Office demanded a third party opinion but still couldn’t stop the banishment which was effected on the 30th of September, 1887. An inquiry into King Jaja’s activities was held in Accra under a senior naval officer, Lord Commissioner of the Admiralty. It appeared that King Jaja’s actions against free trade was out of his ignorance, misinterpretation and later, objection to the Treaty of Berlin.

The Foreign Office had been unaware of this. However, the Admiralty found no proven case against King Jaja, the accused posed threat to penetration “to that only part of the country which is worth exploitation” was severe.

King Jaja was sent to exile for the benefit of free trade in the hinterland. Although King Jaja pleaded in a letter to be exiled in Accra, he was refused as he was thought capable of reasserting his authority from a place so ‘near’.

Jaja's House

The death of King Jaja of Opobo

King Jaja lived the rest of his life in St. Vincent Island in the West Indies. However, in 1891, the British decided that King Jaja could return to his kingdom but on his way back, King Jaja of Opobo died of what many thought was poisoning. JaJa’s death, two decades later, was followed by the Aro War which will open up the entire Igbo hinterland to colonial power.

 

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Incase Of An Electric Fire Occurs In Your House, Don’t Panic, Instead Do The Following To Be Safe

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Paramedics often have to deal with the consequences of our failure to manage electricity with the care and safety that it deserves. Electricity is not something to play around with – neglect and thoughtlessness lead to both electrocution and fire at our homes. In this section we will share information on how to work with electricity safely.Winter typically means spending more time indoors and using more electricity – to heat our homes, power devices that keep us entertained and light up our houses indoors and out during the holidays.

But electricity is a hidden danger to the residents in your community. Because it is so frequently used, most people tend to underestimate the risk potential and dangers that come with electrical fires…Click Here To Continue Reading>> …Click Here To Continue Reading>>

 

In fact, one-third of all home structure fires stem from an electrical source, and because they tend to be difficult to identify, they are usually much more dangerous and destructive than other types of fires.

In an effort to keep your community safe, please keep these tips for combatting an electrical fire handy in the event of an emergency, and share them with friends and family. Knowing how to respond quickly could be the difference between a small fire and a devastating disaster.

The best way to put out an electrical fire is with a fire extinguisher. If you don’t have one, remember these tips.

If an electrical fire starts

1. Cut off the electricity. If the device that is causing the electrical fire is found, and you can reach the cord and outlet safely, unplug it. READ FULL STORY HERE>>>CLICK HERE TO CONTINUE READING>>>

2. You should never throw water on an electrical fire because water conducts electricity and you could be electrocuted.

3. If you don’t have a fire extinguisher, you can use baking soda to extinguish an electrical fire.

4. If there’s smoke, fire or a strange odor coming from your appliances, wires or electric motors, you should turn off both the appliances and the circuit breaker or fuse box’s main switch.

Never under any conditions should you think about utilizing water to extinguish an electrical fire. This is because water is a characteristic conductor of water, and can bring about a stun or even electric shock. Additionally, this could even imply that the fire is spread further.

Regarding an electrical fire, you should utilize a non-conductive one. You should just utilize quenchers powder or CO2 (carbon dioxide).

 

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